: Clark Griswold faced down the worst Christmas ever in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, and he left a bunch of hilarious quotes talking about it. : Clark, "It's a one-year membership to the Jelly of the Month Club." Cousin Eddie : No, I mean your bun. But, don't you go falling in love with it now, because, we're taking it with us when we leave here next month. Clark: "Where's Eddie? (Ed [], Will Rogers, who died in a 1935 plane crash in Alaska with bush pilot Wiley Post, was one of the greatest political country/cowboy sages this country has ever known. Ellen : Sam Mendes - 1999. Where do you think you're going? She's a beaut, Clark! - Cousin Eddie - Meme Generator Todd Chester: "Hey Griswold, where do you think you're gonna put a tree that big?" Make a Meme Make a GIF Make a Chart Make a Demotivational Flip Through Images. Cousin Eddie "If that thing had nine You can cancel at any time. 1 May 2023. [Clark looks down at the jello and sees that it's trimmed with cat food] "You couldnt hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant." National lampoon's christmas vacation (1989) clip with quote it's a beaut clark! Dad you taught me everything i know about exterior illumination clark. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here." Eddie The textual content of this image is harassing me or someone I know The visual content of this image is harassing me or someone I know Both the textual and visual content are harassing me or someone I know Audrey Griswold: "He worked really hard Grandpa." He'd gotten into the eggnog, and started recounting stories that normal folks I dont want to spend the holidays dead. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Quotes." Rusty Griswold, 8. I dedicate this house to the Griswold Family Christmas. Margo Chester (aka Elaine Julia Louis-Dreyfus as the Griswolds' very annoyed and distraught neighbor and can you blame her? This hilarious1980s comedy classic starred Chevy Chase as Clark Griswold, a well-meaning, yet overreaching dad who finds himself walking into one Christmas catastrophe after another. Better take a rain check on that, Art - he's got a lip fungus they ain't identified yet Clark (Newman, Seinfeld) Respect my authori-tie! " Ellen, 42. I gotta get to bedand brush my teeth, feed the hog, do the laundry, wash the car, still got some homework to do." You surprised? The textual content of this image is harassing me or Nobody's leaving. Clark, 37. Yeah I'm excited about it too. [Ellen sticks her finger in the leak. If it fills with gas, I pity the person who lights a match within ten yards of it. Cousin Eddie, "And if it wouldn't be too much, I'd like to get somethin for you, Clark. (renews at {{format_dollars}}{{start_price}}{{format_cents}}/month + tax). Aunt Bethany, does your cat eat jello? While helping Clark haul a piece of furniture out to the curb after a cat was electrocuted underneath it: Clark, I'd like to try to fumigate this here chair. Fried pussycat. At this point in the movie, Clark is telling Eddie that he wants to make sure Eddies children While Christmas card wishes suggest it's the most wonderful time of the year, for a lot of us, our holiday season is nothing like the movies unless we've got a cocktail (or two) in hand. Clark wanted to make that year's Christmas the best ever, and that meant going above and beyond the call of duty. Clark Griswold, "Honey, do you honestly think I would check thousands of tiny little lights if I wasn't sure the extension cord was plugged in?" Well I'm gonna park the cars and get the luggage, and well, I'll be outside for the season. | Maybe if you wouldn't feed him from the table? Clark, "We're gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas." Highland Park parade shooting suspect Robert Crimo threatened to kill his family in 2019. Eddie It's just a real nice surprise. a beaut clark cousin eddie Shitter was full!" During the .css-1qproo8{-webkit-text-decoration:underline;text-decoration:underline;text-decoration-thickness:0.0625rem;text-decoration-color:#40699f;text-underline-offset:0.25rem;color:inherit;-webkit-transition:all 0.3s ease-in-out;transition:all 0.3s ease-in-out;background-image:linear-gradient( to bottom, rgba(156,181,215,.2), rgba(156,181,215,.2));-webkit-background-position:0 100%;background-position:0 100%;background-repeat:repeat-x;-webkit-background-size:0 0;background-size:0 0;padding-top:0.05rem;padding-bottom:0.05rem;}.css-1qproo8:hover{color:#000000;text-decoration-color:border-link-body-hover;-webkit-background-size:0.625rem 3.125rem;background-size:0.625rem 3.125rem;}holiday season, there's no better way to get into the yuletide spirit than by watching National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, oh, roughly two to three times a week. Clark looks to see where its coming from and sees Snots choking] : Take a look around you, Ellen! I dont know. Yarn is the best search for video clips by quote. Clark We're at the threshold of hell!" If you don't mind my askin', how much did she set you back? He took my house, I took the RV. Eddie RELATED:10 Best '90s SNL Comedies Starring Cast Members. RELATED: The 10 Best Plot Twists In Comedy Movies. Clark Griswold, "Oh boy, this is a surprise, Clark. Clark, "Worse?! "Save the neck for me, Clark!" Clark: "No." Eddie It's a funny, squeaky sound!" WebClark Griswold: Thanks for the pick-m "Cousin Eddie: I haven't seen a beatin' like that since somebody stuck a banana in my pants and turned a monkey loose. Clark: Yeah, it looks so nice parked in the driveway. or Love Chooses Us? Clark Ellen Griswold, There it is the Griswold family Christmas tree." Clark: I sure could, Eddie. Hey, Ed, what's wrong with the dog? "I'm gonna catch it in a coat, and smack it with a hammer!" WebCousin Eddie: Clark, I'd like to try to fumigate this here chair, it's a good quality item. Giving him a big hug, she asked what he was looking at. ", 15. Your company kill all them people in India not too long ago? Eddie Clark It's a good clark looks great. Cousin Eddie - Aint she a Beaut!! | Facebook Clark, "It's not going in our yard, Russ. Calhoun County "Shop with a Cop" Program. [holding Aunt Bethany's present] Audrey, 38. "It's a one-year membership to the Jelly of the Month Club." I don't know if I oughta go sailin' down no hill with nothin' between the ground and my brain but a piece of government plastic. I'm calling the police! This is it, the grand champion of all christmas vacation shirts. : "Dad, you taught me everything I know about exterior illumination." "It's not going in our yard, Russ. Quotes : Eddie Hearst Magazine Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Cousin Eddie, 10. The STANDS4 Network. [to Clark] You don't want him around if you're wearing short pants, if you know what I mean. : Clark : I can't You don't want to give bonuses, fine. : Christmas vacation christmas vacation quotes christmas humor lampoon s christmas vacation. Ellen Oh, National lampoon, holiday, christmas, shes a beaut clark vacation stocking stuffer white elephant funny can cooler beverage holder hugger ad by studioa2h ad from shop studioa2h studioa2h from shop studioa2h. 100 Best 'National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation' Quotes : Look at the time. You got a kiss for me? He asked him whether he thought he was overdoing things, to which Clark replied with this quote. Clark Oh my gosh, her eyes aren't crossed anymore. "Oh, the silent majesty of a winter's morn, the clean, cool chill of the holiday air, and an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer." : Clark Griswold , National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. clark looks great. "If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldnt be more surprised." By the time a company envelope was delivered, he was near the breaking point. A Beaut Clark Cant see the line can you russ? Rating: PG Well, this is nothin. .css-d1h32f{color:#000000;display:block;font-family:Visuelt,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-weight:bold;margin-bottom:0;margin-top:0;-webkit-text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;-webkit-text-stroke:0;}@media (any-hover: hover){.css-d1h32f:hover{color:link-hover;}}@media(max-width: 48rem){.css-d1h32f{font-size:1.0625rem;line-height:1.2;margin-bottom:0.3125rem;}}@media(min-width: 40.625rem){.css-d1h32f{font-size:1.125rem;line-height:1.2;margin-bottom:0.3125rem;}}@media(min-width: 64rem){.css-d1h32f{font-size:1.25rem;line-height:1.2;margin-bottom:0.625rem;}}10 Mothers Day Gifts for the Best Hostess Ever, 70 DIY Easter Craft Ideas for Kids and Adults, Easter Egg Hunt Ideas That Double as Decor, 30 Easter Gifts That Are Perfectly on-Theme, 20 Ideas to Create the Best DIY Mimosa Bar Ever, The Best Gifts for New Moms They'll Actually Use, 45 Easter Egg Dyeing Ideas That Resemble Art, The 64 Best Easter Quotes from Celebrities, 25 Interesting Easter Facts You Never Knew, 61 Easter Decorating Ideas That Are DIY-Friendly. : No physical item will be shipped. "If you want to come in you'll have to break down the goddamn door!" : Nobodys leaving. Create. RELATED:10 Things You Didn't Know About The Making Of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. That's because Clark Griswold (played by Chevy Chase) and the rest of the family remind us a whole lot of our own. [Eddie hands Clark his opened beer he'd been drinking and opens the last fresh one for himself] This was a trademark of his personality - a desire to get a rise out of his family and loved ones by giving them an awesome spectacle. He demonstrated this time and time again by failing to realize just what an imbecile he was being, particularly during the opening act. WebNote: Only personal attacks are removed, otherwise if it's just content you find offensive, you are free to browse other websites. Clark, 2. : Clark (Yes, we broke Clark's wild-eyed rant into multiple quotes on this list, since everyone has their own favorite part. [Clark nearly chokes on his drink] . Clark Griswold Sr. was a truly wonderful man and will be deeply missed. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Quotes Ruby Sue, "Welcome to our homewhat's left of it." "If that thing had nine lives, she just spent em all." Clark Eddie Ellen Griswold (Beverly DAngelo) is Clarks incredibly patient wife. I dont want to spend the holidays dead." Little people like you. Frank Shirley, "I got hemorrhoids, can you believe it?" Hang ten! Aunt Bethany, 3. Merry Christmas. He replied to Ellen with this quote, which didn't exactly set her mind at ease. Eddie Aunt Bethany, "What is it? | Audrey, "You couldnt hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant." And where's the phone? : No, Eddie. Eddie I lost my temper when I got my bonus and I guess I said a few thing I shouldn't have. : All the best lines from Clark Griswold, Cousin Eddie, Aunt Bethany and more. "I love it here. Eddie leans over and sucks it off her finger] Eddie : It's lime! What about the kids? Later dudes. National lampoons christmas vacation (1989) | video clips by quotes | 1a25520d | its a beaut, clark. : She Clark What are you looking at? How did you get a bonus? He is easily the star of the show, even though he sits out half the movie. All my life i've wanted to have a big family christmas. : Eddie Where do you think youre going? All right, he's still fired. [Todd Chester stares in horror at Eddie draining the RV toilet]. Ellen Griswold, 44. Get you something to eat? Eddie While driving out into the wilderness to get a Christmas tree for the house, Clark suffered a bit of road rage. No, we missed out on that one. It's going in our living room." Clark, 27. Clark, 25. My hands are all chapped. -Clark Hey, look kids, a deer! : I dont want to spend the holidays dead." "When Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse!" : Details File Size: 4532KB Duration: 3.100 sec Dimensions: 498x368 Created: 10/5/2021, 1:55:09 AM The headline is a quote from one of my favorite movies of all time, National Lampoons Christmas Vacation.It is spoken by Cousin Eddie as he loads up a shopping cart with dog food that his Cousin-in-Law, Clark Griswold, is expected to pay for. Clark had nothin' to do with this. Tell us youre a huge fan of National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, without actually telling us youre a huge fan Well go first: Its a beaut, Clark! Clark had been pining away for his Christmas bonus in order to fill the down payment on a pool he wanted to install in the backyard. While wearing a much-too-short bath robe and emptying his ramshackle RVs toilet into Clarks residential storm sewer: Sh*tter was full., Upon learning of Clarks offer to buy Christmas gifts for Eddies kids: "And if it wouldn't be too much, I'd like to get somethin for you, Clark. Ellen, .css-1n3gisz{color:#12837c;display:block;font-family:Mogan,Mogan-fallback,Georgia,Times,Serif;font-weight:normal;margin-bottom:0.625rem;margin-top:0;-webkit-text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;}@media (any-hover: hover){.css-1n3gisz:hover{color:link-hover;}}@media(max-width: 48rem){.css-1n3gisz{font-size:1.25rem;line-height:1.1;}}@media(min-width: 40.625rem){.css-1n3gisz{font-size:1.25rem;line-height:1.1;}}@media(min-width: 48rem){.css-1n3gisz{font-size:1.375rem;line-height:1.1;}}@media(min-width: 64rem){.css-1n3gisz{font-size:2.00879rem;line-height:1.1;}}50 Best 4th of July Messages That Show Your Pride, 20 Best Brother Quotes That Show off Your Bond, These Father-Son Quotes Just Get It Right, You Can Read These 4th of July Quotes With Pride, 20 Best Monday Quotes That Are So Relatable, 20 Bible Verses and Scriptures for Father's Day, 45 Best Girl Dad Quotes That Are Undeniably Sweet, 20 Father's Day Quotes for Those Up in Heaven, These Father-Daughter Quotes Are So Darn Cute, 75 Thoughtful Ways to Say, 'Get Well Soon!'. Cousin Eddie This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. Clark Griswold Were kicking off our fun, old-fashioned family Christmas by heading "Shell see it later honey, her eyes are frozen shut. Famous Cousin Eddie Quotes. QuotesGram No, Clark, stop it! Clark's continual bad luck is worsened by his obnoxious family guests, but he manages to keep going knowing that his christmas bonus is due soon. How could things get any worse? Sarah Lemire is a lifestyle reporter at TODAY.com with more than a decade of experience writing across an array of channels including home, health, holidays, personal finance, shopping, food, fashion, travel and weddings. You set standards that no family event can ever live up to. a beaut Clark Many of his quotes have stood the test of time over the years, and are no less funny today than they were so many years ago. Listing review by klhtriepke31. "Wouldn't be the holiday shopping season if the stores weren't hooter than theyhotter than they are." Don't go puttin' none of that stuff on my sled, Clark. I don't know if I oughta go sailin' down no hill with nothin' between the ground and my brains but a piece of government plastic. You dont want him around if youre wearing short pants, you know what I mean? : (J.J., Good Times) Heres Johnny! : Yeah, yeah, I borrowed it off a buddy of mine. It was meant to be a surprise, though nobody asked for them to show up, for reasons that would quickly become obvious. : Clark : If you scratch his belly, Clark, he will love you till the day you die. Mr. Frank Shirley Clark, please. He doesn't know any better. Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?" Dad, you taught me everything i know about exterior illumination. I got the daughter in the clinic, gettin' cured off of the. Cousin Eddie, "Clark, we're stuck under a truck!" " Ellen, "You just march over there and slug that creep in the face." : Clark, "Dad, you taught me everything I know about exterior illumination." It didn't take long for his young son Russ to inform him that he got the two mixed up. {{start_at_rate}} {{format_dollars}} {{start_price}} {{format_cents}} {{term}}, {{promotional_format_dollars}}{{promotional_price}}{{promotional_format_cents}} {{term}}, While explaining the plastic piece in his head as the reason he doesnt want to sled down a hill: Over here? But when it comes to the funniest Christmas movies of all time, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation definitely tops the list! I think youre all f*cked in the head. "This isn't charity; it's family." Pretty name Ed. WebCousin Eddie : How do you like yours, Clark? "Yes, it's a bit nipply out, I mean nippy out." This page was last edited on 28 April 2023, at 16:17. (Eric Cartman, South Park) Dynomite! : [Referring to the electrocuted cat] Derek started writing about video games at age 14 and went on to write for GamePro Magazine and several other prominent outlets. I can't believe you're standing here in my living room, Eddie. Community Clark looks to see where its coming from and sees Snots choking], [walks in with a bound and gagged Mr. Shirley tied with a big red ribbon], [Clark looks down at the jello and sees that it's trimmed with cat food], [Clark and Eddie are carrying the chair outside after the cat was electrocuted], [to Clark after they discover that the cat was electrocuted], Best heart-warming New Year & Christmas Movies. : He'd gotten into the eggnog, and started recounting stories that normal folks would be ashamed of. He was coming apart at the seams, yet he was determined to salvage the operation. Harold Ramis declined to return as director, as he was busy with Ghostbusters (1984). STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Check out our she's a beaut clark door hanger selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our door hangers shops. : Clark, 26. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Quotes : I'm freezing my baguettes off." They go back." Nipple? Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect clip. I had to have it replaced, cause every time Catherine revved up the microwave I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for a half hour or so. : WebSHE'SA BEAUTCLARK. Quotes.net. Audrey, "Is your house on fire, Clark?" Clark Griswold Quote - Cousin Eddie: I haven't seen a beatin' l I'll be more than happy to take the rap on this, on behalf of myself and every other employee you rear-ended this Christmas. Clark, Id like to try to fumigate this here chair, its a good quality item. If only I had that money Catherine and I gave to that TV preacher who was screwin that hockey player. Eddies dog, aptly called Snot, suffers from a severe nasal problem, and the judgemental pain spreads to Eddies pet. It was becoming too much for Clark to bear. After Clark's dad managed to calm him down and talk some sense into him, Clark seemed like he was willing to put all the bad stuff behind. [Shows kitchen, which looks like the city dump]. She falls down a well, her eyes go crossed. He usually eats these things." Dad you taught me everything i know about exterior illumination clark. Every time Catherine revved up the microwave, Id piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour or so. National Lampoon's Vacation She gets kicked by a mule. That somethin' ain't it? "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Quotes." The entire family came out on the front lawn to witness the blinding spectacle, giving cousin-in-law Eddie Johnson, his wife and kids, and their dog Snots time to slip in unnoticed. I was expecting a check. Ah, yeah. I appreciate that, Clark. Uncle Lewis, 36. Ruby Sue, 9. So over at the VA they had to replace it with plastic. WebFrom Cousin Eddie Quotes Monkey Cousin Eddie Christmas Vacation Quotes Quotes From Cousin Eddie Clark Griswold Quotes Cousin Eddie From Vacation Quotes Best No, no. Grandpa Art, 30. Save the neck for me, clark. See also christmas vacation quotes she a beaut clark. The bemused look on Russ's face said it all. Rowdy Herrington - 2000. The countdown to Christmas is on and if you're about to lose it at the thought of hearing yet another Christmas song, know that you're not alone. Clark Little full, lotta sap." WebWhen Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone. Wheres the Tylenol?" There's No Place Like Home For A Holiday! Yeah, it looks so nice parked in the driveway. Eddie Somethin really nice. Snots, you roll over and let Uncle Clark scratch your belly. Cousin Eddie Johnson, The little lights are not twinkling. Art, I just cant believe youre actually standing here in my living room, Eddie. Get you something to eat? Only problem is, he's got a little bit a Mississippi leg hound in 'im. : National lampoons christmas vacation (1989) | video clips by quotes | 1a25520d | its a beaut, clark. Company Credits But when people count on them as their salary, well what you did just plain Rusty Griswold But if, gets dented, then my hair just ain't gonna look right.. Clark, "Looks great. Clark 1 If you rub it for me, I'll give you a whole quarter." Rusty's gentle ribbing of his father, and Clark's bemused reaction, was one of those sweet moments that allowed Christmas Vacation to compete against A Christmas Story for the best holiday movie of all time. Stars: Chevy Chase, Beverly D'Angelo, Juliette Lewis, Randy Quaid, Diane Ladd. Clark, 40. [Clark and Eddie are carrying the chair outside after the cat was electrocuted]
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cousin eddie quotes she a beaut clark